Self Portrait

by Jennifer M. Dryden (c) 2009

My deep-set brown eyes and dark brown hair come identical to my brother and father.  Brutal honesty comes from years with my mother’s frustrating attempts to sugarcoat reality, relying on me to bring her back. I’ve been called high maintenance, independent, dorky, and emotionally vulnerable. I agree. I’m loud, impatient, opinionated, calm, and excited all in the same hour usually.

The blueprint to my inner self is sort of like a treasure map. It’s challenging, confusing, sometimes hard to read, but rewarding when reaching the center – my heart. I have a good heart. Accumulated bricks are built up ten feet tall to protect it, each brick stained with past mistakes and heart breaks. For kids and family members, it’s easy to break through, but for potential life mates they’ll need the map.

Passion flows throughout me, and it changes almost daily.  I love to report news, no, write features, but then again I like to edit, no, copy edit, but then I want to quit all together and teach. Yes, teach little kids – elementary education! Wait, no, high school English. Maybe someday college journalism? Sure, why not.  No specific part of me knows what it wants. I love too many things and hold too many high expectations for myself.

I love being alone. Not a lot of college students do, but I crave a quiet, empty space after a typical busy day that consists of three classes, two meetings, TA work, four hours of two-year-olds and a phone call from mom. I love keeping busy and being involved but am overly obsessed with coming home to no one and writing for hours or simply lying around watching my latest TV series obsession.

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